Breathing space: Too much proximity breeds contempt. This is a fact we all live and suffer through due to an overbearing involvement with another individual’s life, be it one’s work subordinate or spouse. No matter how devoted a person is to a relationship, everyone has a basic need for freedom and if ignored, this can suffocate relationships to death.

Indifference to difference: Opposites attract is a good reminder when we find ourselves drifting away in a relationship on account of differences of opinion and functioning style. To have differences up to a point is a healthy thing like having a multi-skilled cricket team, some bat while others bowl helps form a winning team.

Communication: Good communication involves speaking and listening, the latter usually needing much more attention. Observation and sensitivity to non-verbal communication, a smile, a hug, tears or a round of sport can be much more profound forms of communication for bonding in relationships.

Judgment: Presumptions made on account of past behaviour or our opinions often create negative judgmental knots in relationships. A fresh ‘learning child’s mind’ and new beginning approach even in the middle of conflict can be a tonic to tackle bitter deadlocked interpersonal prejudices.

Promises: Often commitments are easier made than kept. Therefore, it is better to make fewer promises and keep them. This helps protect loved ones from the disappointment of broken promises.

Walk the talk: Especially with the younger generation, endless sermonising doesn’t break ice. Instead, stepping out of our paradigm zones to live and see a little of their perspective of life may inspire the reverse in them.

Acceptance: When things just don’t work, accepting the end of a bad relationship is a very courageous step in empowering oneself and others involved in moving on with life. Remember, a train has to leave a platform to create space for a new train to arrive.

Pic: Sue Byford